You mean Theo Epstein isn’t perfect? What?!?!?!

New Englanders have for years waxed poetic on Theo.

  • “Oh, Theo is so smart!”
  • “Oh, Theo always has a plan!”
  • “Oh, Theo secretly exited in a  monkey disguise! He’s so clever.”
  • “Oh, Theo plays guitar!”
  • “Oh, Theo is so persuasive that he convinced the hair on his head to stop receding!”
  • “Oh, Theo always gets his man! Even if it means he visits their house on Thanksgiving!”

Whatever…

The 2009 Red Sox are officailly overrated. Theo built a bad team. Yes, it’s true. He built a bad team for 2009…and maybe for the next few years.

  • Matsuzaka is a bust. They will try to trade him next year, eat money, and get little in return.
  • Bay is no Manny. And they are trying to sign him long term.
  • They’re going to ruin Youkilis moving him around so damn much.
  • Bucholz (sp) is considerably overrated.
  • Victor Martinez is a DH. He’s a horrible catcher and a barely serviceable first baseman.
  • Did he really think Smoltz, Penny, and Baldelli were going to help this team? They weren’t budget moves with tons of upside…they were stupid moves. And everyone else in baseball knew it…why the hell else would the Braves have divorced themselves from the stubborn Smoltz????
  • He could have gone $10-15 million higher over 8 years and they would  have had Teixeira!!! Foolish. Just so that they can stick to their dopey Red Sox valuations. “We set a value on a player and we stick to it blah blah blah…”
  • The team hasn’t had a decent shortstop in years.
  • They’re slow…V-Mart, Papi, Youkilis, Drew, Varitek, Lowell, Kotchmen…
  • Moneyball is stupid. When was the last time the A’s won anything? Billy Beane has ruined the A’s.

Is Theo a good GM? Yes, he is. BUT…it’s not like he doesn’t have money to work with. Red Sox Nation (one of the dopiest monikers I’ve ever heard) is taking on water.  I can’t wait for it to fully capsize and for the grumpy, crabby, jealous Red Sox fan to be reborn.